It is around 4AM. The pain does not let me sleep. I am exhausted. My eyes itch. If I sit and meditate, my head falls and I fall asleep sitting, but I wake up because I am about to fall from bed. When I lie down the pain increases and I can’t sleep.
I come to the paper.
Speak now, I say to Int. (intuition).
Speak to me now. What do you have to say?
As I am making the first line, everything slows down. Again, with a feeling of love, I follow every line slowly as it leads me. Again Int. gives me a water landscape with rocks in the water. It happened several times before. This time there are also hills, mountains and trees. I remember a vision that I have frequently, when I step into “What’s next” imagination. It is of a beautiful place in nature with a lot of trees, mountains and sunlight. I am in wonder there. I take it that Int. wants me to imagine this vision more.
I remember Dain Heer (of Access Consciousness) saying that if something that you experience does not feel as yours or someone else’s, it is of the earth. The intelligence of the earth wants me to do something for her.
I also remember Lester (Levenson), who in a very vivid dream, in which I felt more love than I had ever felt, told me to keep the word EARTH in my head all the time, and this would heal my foot.
I start to understand. This picture that I see in my own drawings, when I am driven to draw by the question: ”What is going on with the pain?” is what the earth wants me to imagine more and more. By imagining it, I’ll help bring this picture into reality.
As I am asking what to do, and expect it to have something to do with my gifts, the healing ability, the art and all that comes with it, and the love that I feel, I am getting an answer but it is an answer that I did not expect.
In the next drawing
I simply listen to what different parts in the drawing do, I write them down, I scramble the lines, I fix them a little, and this is what comes.
I am gracefully supporting you
We are together
This is where we are going now
I am shining
We sweetly go to the horizon
We are playing and daring
We are all connected with trust and friendliness
We are light
I am who I am
I know exactly how to create balance
The next drawing is an answer to the question: What is in it (the pain) for me that I am not getting?
I just wrote what I saw.
I see fields
But there is an earthquake going on
And the earth shakes
I see a hill and I am standing on it
The earth sends a folding path up into the sky
It is possible to walk on it
To go above the mountains
To see the landscape underneath
And the strange light
Coming from the sea
And arching above the mountains.
I started this drawing with a raging pain. Doing this process I became a witness, instead of being involved. And I see: This is what is happening. Obviously it is a big upheaval. Everything will be different afterward.