Archive for January, 2016

221. The explosion

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One of us complained about a headache. It was the evening talk on a retreat. We all sat around our master. And it was way into the night. When he finished talking this friend raised his hand and complained.

Your headache is just a wandering thought, the master said.

I don’t remember what was spoken after that because this sentence hit me strongly. I would not be able to explain it, but I knew that this was true.

I also had a headache. I was exhausted from the intense concentration that I used in my meditation all through the day.

Soon after the conversation ended we meditated again. The sentence repeated itself in my head. It is true, I thought. The way my body feels is a wandering thought. And just like with every other wandering thought, I can let it go.

Then there was an explosion in my neck. The head was blown away. The throat remained torn to scraps. I saw this clearly as I was floating in the air behind myself. I was very peaceful and in wonder. There was no time.

Now I understand some of it. The pain is a result of a thought. This is clear. Everything that we experience is a result of thoughts that we believe. The experience is not always exactly as we anticipate, but it always matches our vibrational state.

My teacher and many other teachers never explained this. They prefer to leave things mysterious. Or they do not want to give us the knowledge to change our reality. They want us to transcend it.

When I started the blog I knew that the pain and the malfunctioning of the body came from thoughts. I knew that if I released the beliefs that created the malfunctioning, the fundamental belief that creates the body in its healthy state would take back the controls and the body would heal. This is the direction that I took and there is the evidence for it in the blog. But I am still with the malfunction and the pain. Many times lately I felt desperate, tired of the struggle. I wanted to give up. But I didn’t want to give up. I wanted to rest. If it would lead to the death of the body than let it be so.

My essence, the truth of who I am, cannot be harmed.

I think part of my struggle is because I do not want to lose the fight with the powers that, as I imagined, wanted to block me from developing. This struggle belongs to a non-existent figure. I can let it go now. I wrote about this kind of struggle and I can write again in another entry. The interest in finding the way to heal myself should, as I truly believe and as I teach my clients, come from curiosity, playfulness, love, peace and joy. Coming from these energies that are the natural energy of all of us, it cannot be a struggle. It can only be a joy. There should not be a difference between the true expression of who I am and healing. In other words this means that in order to heal we need to be in the energy of the truth of who we are.

So I allowed myself to enter with my boat into the river of who I am, throw the oars away and let the stream take me.

All that I wrote after the end of the healing descriptions (after #58) was about living in the downstream direction.

When the pain is great I loose sight of this sometimes and the old I appears. Maybe I can allow the pain to kill me, bend me down and break me apart? Maybe I can let the head explode and disappear. I can live without a head.

220. Let the dummy share the happiness

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It has been some time since I wrote for this blog. I was changing and needed to focus inward. I was not in the mood to share. I knew I had to get rid of fear once and for all.

During the time that I did not write, it became clear to me that I and everyone of us lives in a unique, private world. This world responds precisely to our vibrations. If we did not have a huge subconscious with many beliefs about the world and life, then everything we wanted would appear in the world that is ours. It is these hidden beliefs that create the universe that we experience. If what we want is contradicted by one of these many beliefs in the subconscious, it will not appear in our universe until we get rid of the belief that contradicts it, or the new belief becomes  more prominent.

When I discovered this more clearly than before, I also understood that nobody needs therapy. Giora,(my name,) who was supposed to live in my body does not really exist. There is a bunch of experiences that are activated by all of those hidden beliefs. One of these beliefs is that they all belong to Giora. That’s all. Just a belief. So who is playing with this body? It is the true self, an infinite consciousness, part of all that is. And just like me, everybody who was my client has a true self and there is nobody who lives in their bodies. The true self is powerful, imaginative, loving and always happy beyond measure. The same is true for everyone. So nothing is wrong with the true owners of the bodies who used to come to me for art therapy.

When I discovered this, I lost interest in therapy. Everything is okay and there is nothing to fix, I knew.

Then, within two weeks all my clients disappeared. I did not tell them to go. But my vibrations were not a match to theirs any more. They went to other countries, they got married, they got ill and went to other states.

It made me happy in some strange way, as I saw that my subconscious is already pretty clean from disturbing beliefs. And where there is no resistance to new vibrations, they manifest immediately.

I came to this relative cleanliness with the help of this method of making intuitive art and reading it. I know I’ll write about the method more in the future, so I allow myself to leave this subject alone in this entry.

The effectiveness of my method, about which I knew already, became even more convincing. It can go very far. It is sweet and wonderful. And it helps clean the subconscious. It also shows the way to live fully.

I can do many other things, I thought. I can make a living by selling art. I can write more books, I can make children’s books, which was my main occupation for many years. There are many things I can do. My new occupation will show itself. So I did not worry.

I also knew that if it will be working with people, it will be different. It won’t be about the psychology that belongs to the personality. Instead, it will be about helping people see the truth and free themselves. IN the process the personality is cleaned anyway. That’s actually what I always did and it was hidden under my practice of art therapy. But it will be different now.

Everything has changed.

And suddenly, without me doing anything, many people started connecting with me on LinkedIn. And then came a wave of new subscribers to my blog, which was asleep in its URL.

I think I know what all of this tells me. Go back, Giora. Yes, you don’t exist. It’s true. But the dummy is useful.

Let the dummy share the happiness of the real one.

And to all the newcomers: A very warm hearted welcome. I hope the blog will be useful to you. The circle of friends has grown.


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The healing process

Entries 1-58 show how I use the method of Intuition Through Art to heal myself from Peripheral Neuropathy.