Posts Tagged 'growing'

168. Questions and a new beginning

Somehow I lost the drive to read art. I mean to read my art. I still read others’. I feel resistance to reading mine. Maybe the reason is that I think: Well, what is the point? It does not mean much, since I am not attached to it. There is no reason why I’ll let this past thing interfere with what I want to do now. So why bother reading it? It looks beautiful anyway. Looked at from a deeper state, all the complications look beautiful, and this is enough to see.

Where does the beauty come from?

So what can I do with these artworks?

How can I continue my blog? After I stopped being interested in the contents of my past, it has become hard to add anything to the blog.

I had some very good, high feelings, that I described, and some less good feelings, but now, what am I to do with this blog?

Maybe this is the place to go up and up in vibrations?  So this is a new beginning.

Life as a process

Life as a process

Let’s look at this last drawing now.

There are warm colors at the bottom and they gradually turn colder until it is blue, transparent and very soft. I think that the texture, in spite of the coldness of the color itself, gives some warmth, related to the sensitivity that is expressed. So it is coldness described very sensitively. Maybe aloofness? So you become very interested, being a sensitive person that you are.

There is a feeling that something is growing in the drawing. There is a wider base shape, almost like the leaves of a plant close to the earth. From this comes a stem and another stem in orange and from them some flower, leaf, or a canopy, develop. All these happen in the warmer area. Then of course, if you think of it as a plant or a flower, then you have to have the sky somewhere behind and above. But the sky is not just a flat color. Something is alive there. Shapes come out of shapes, right side and left side parts, describing something that is not so clear realistically. What is it?

A dream?  Sleeping? Something in a sleeping bag? Clouds? A letter? and what letter is it? Yes, it is the G from my own name. I did not notice this when I made the drawing. Planning.. sleeping.. this is connected to that.. life.

A plant is growing, still with the original thought of: Be a plant, be intense or mild. The intense side remains undeveloped. It sends feelers to the left side, the milder, so see what is life like on that side. Of course, here you have the fear of opening up and being yourself completely, checking yourself against another. Then, many thought patterns develop and they will create this plant’s future, its new adventure, its expansion or its remaining limited and constrained.

Is there a separation between the physical and the mental? Between the simple program to grow (It is not simple really but not complicated by thoughts of and the complicated thought patters, to do this and that etc? Yes and no. How about this answer? You can see that this part is warm and that is cold. But where they touch, they melt into each other. The physical and the imagined melt into each other. They are connected, and there is a feeling of lingering there, where they touch. Is it attachment? I mean attachment from the Buddhist perspective, as of assigning importance to something and therefore holding on to something that otherwise would have just gone on and change into something else.

This melting into each other is true also for every step before this thinking occurs. The leaf melts into the stem. The stem melts into the flowering and the flowering melts into the imagination. What kind of being is that? Who is this? What a magical creature that is a process?

And the whole scene has a magical feel to it. Things happen in the dream world, softly, silently. Are they real? Who is telling the story here? Is it the stem? The canopy? Me? You? Who are you anyway? Are you evolving from my dream? Am I nothing else but your imagination process?

I am leaving you with many questions. Who needs an answer, when you have questions like these? It all keeps being created, flowing toward what seems to be up in this case. Maybe nothing really moves? Maybe it is all a thought in endlessness, which has never changed

135. The greens that look so real

I haven’t written for the blog for a while. I kept drawing every day and reading my drawings. Sometimes I drew more times than in other days. Basically these are all processes that you have seen me doing before. Discovering blockages and dissolving them, expressing experiences of expanded states, asking intuition and getting answers.

Doing this process is the best thing I have ever done in my life. And I have done a lot before this. I illustrated more than 40 children’s books, I wrote three of them. I know I have helped many people change their lives for the better, I raised three children, I showed my art, I got lost in making art silk screen prints until my money ended, I left New York for two and a half months when I had an exhibition in Germany and when I came back I lost all my illustration clients and changed my career. A few of my illustrations are still going around the world with an exhibition of political illustrations done for INX. I had spiritual experiences and spent twelve years in intense meditation. I did a lot more. I went back to school to study art therapy at age 58, I presented my method of using intuition through art in conferences and in some cases people were so moved that they had tears in their eyes.  I know I have already done a lot. But this, taking care of my own development through using my own method, has been the best thing I have ever done. This has deepened my understanding of myself and of others and made me into a much better therapist or healer. I discovered my ability to read people from far and know what to do to help them. And I am still learning. All this burst of growth in my late sixties came from this work that I am doing on myself. This work is my meditation, my prayer, my connection to the truth, my expansion.

I am so sure about the strength and benefits of this method that I am now making arrangements for teaching it to people who are interested in using it for themselves and for helping others. It works much better than traditional psychotherapy. I have already started teaching it to a few.

The following picture and poem are just where I am today.

The greens that look so real

The greens that look so real

The greens that appear so real

Are the children of thoughts

The lovely earth, ploughed with horses

And crops growing

Near the vivid blue

Are all the children of thoughts

Made in the open space

Of eternal love. 


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The healing process

Entries 1-58 show how I use the method of Intuition Through Art to heal myself from Peripheral Neuropathy.

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