Posts Tagged 'intense'

196. The Family

The Family

The Family

I called it “The Family.”

This is what I thought when I made it. I started with the figure in black, which is the man. Then the child in brown, leaning at the man and I felt then that I wanted to add the woman in pink. The man is frightening. He wears a gown, like a king or a lord. He is very proud and intense and angry.

The woman seems to be powerless, supposed to support the man but to always be too weak to stand in his way, if this becomes necessary. But she has independence in the area of softness and subtleties. This, actually, gives her true power. Not the power to fight but the power to be happy, if she chooses.

The boy admires his father, wants his support and protection. Maybe wants to be like the father, but he is soft too, like the mother. He makes an intense face like the father, but in his stomach he is soft. His points of power are in his connections to nature, where there is a potential for growth and unexpected strength. He may become free of both his parents with their tendencies. But at this moment that the drawing describes, he does not know yet what he can do, and he takes on the roles that his family and society expect him to take. But the knowing that is already in him, already gives him power that he is not aware of. A small spur of growth would shake the balance in the family, but his growth is not of the kind that competes. It is the kind that is kind and loving, and that says yes to all. Yes, be that. Yes be this. Yes, as your free will gives you the opportunity to be.

Yes..

Is there a dance in this? Yes, the dance of subtle potentialities, already communicating with each other, already allowing each other to be as they want. Already seeing the big and deep picture in which everything is alright and even perfect. Living the pretend life that the autopilots dictate, but unable to stop the flow of uniqueness.

All is good, in the midst of conflicts and obscuration. Clarity steps silently forward to be itself. You don’t have to wait and see. It is already in its best.

A note: I do not agree with the roles that society assigns the genders. If every one fulfills their true potential, they are happy, regardless of gender roles. This drawing describes the gender roles as society sees them, but also the clarity that invites what is unique and true, to come in and be lived.

118. Full of curious life force

I am going through changes and for some time I felt as if I was floating in space in some way, not feeling like doing anything, because it was not clear to me why to act at all. A whole old paradigm, so to speak, became obsolete and the new paradigm is unfolding still.

I did a lot of drawings during this process and won’t be able to show them all to you. I never was able to sow all that I was doing. I try to show the important ones. Some of the work included pretty intense release of old programs from the subconscious. Thinking about what I intended to do, I found myself afraid one day and started to draw, which lead me to feel wanting to grow but escaping, then there was a big self cancellation, then an experience of shock, then anger and more anger, and eventually good feeling. This was done in twelve drawings and quick writing, in one evening and the morning that came after it.

Then there was a shorter, four pictures version of the same thing, as it repeated itself like an echo.

Then these two:

For the first, five short poems came, instead of a single long one.

Curious

Curious

As they are looking for something they forgot

They are making a tapestry

Of happy swimming.

Tickling each other pleasantly

Telling each other they cannot find their goal

They are full of curious life force.

Laughing

Sliding bodies

With open eyes.

Filling up the space

Many fish are

Swimming nowhere

To the sun they come

From the depths

Of darkness.

Looking at the drawing now I feel I did not express something about the quality of the lines in the lower part. They seem to be rotting. There is a Zen book called Swampland Flowers, which is a collection of letters written by master Ta Hui to a student, about how to practice in everyday life. The name means to hint at the idea that the lotus flower, which represents enlightenment, cannot grow in the clean fresh air of the mountains. It has to grow in the swamps of the valleys, where it is hot, humid and dirty.

I see in it all the joy that arises from all of my self-work and the peace I feel about pleasant, light hearted touching.

The next drawing is from two days later.

Touching lightly

Touching lightly

Standing one behind the other

Curious and interested in experiencing

The parts that were banned

And what a blessing it is

There are many ways of saying no

But the yes is one

And always there, inside of all of them

As it is

Forever true.

Looking at the two drawings and words you can see how things work themselves quietly in the subconscious. The constant exposure to the flow of intuition, or maybe I can call it the flow of truth, gradually dissolves everything that is not true and leaves what is true untouched, as it can never be taken away. It was a surprise for me when this happened, because I did not work on it knowingly. This too shows something about the method of intuitive flow. You just do the work, following what comes up and there is a wise order of what is being tackled, happening on its own, guided by deeper knowledge. We could not arrive at this wise order through thinking and analyzing. Life, as it turns out, is much easier than your think.

I remember working with a person who came to me to get rid of his depression. We worked on whatever showed up. Sometimes it was possible to see that it was related to the depression, and sometimes it was other things. Dealing with all that just floated up to our knowledge, one thing after another, one day there was no depression there any more. And this is for life, as all the mental software that created the depression, all that tapestry of many small issues, dissolved and was not there any more.


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The healing process

Entries 1-58 show how I use the method of Intuition Through Art to heal myself from Peripheral Neuropathy.

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