Posts Tagged 'wind'

270. Sending questions to myself

Boiling conversation

I had an imaginary conversation

With a teacher

I let the conversation boil

And took it off the stove

To cool down

I saw I do not need this food

Any more

My soup is ready

Between the milky-way

And Andromeda

I wrote a letter this morning

And forgot to send it

The small waves

On the surface of the ocean

Carried the message for me

As far as it was needed

My friends are listening

Everywhere

They smiled

They flip flopped

They sent the message back to me

With the wind

Next time when I write

I’ll take the letter out myself

And put it carefully

In my own mailbox.

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216. The story point of view and the energy point of view

The influence of the wind.

The left and the right.

There is some discrepancy between the right side and the left side of the picture. The left is loose and hardly organized. It looks like something that is falling apart. The right is better organized, but it is losing some of its order by the pressure and movement that come from the left.

The right is filled with interesting things that try hard to hold on to their shapes. The left looks as if it used to have shapes too, but with the movement, no good form is left in it.

What does it mean?

From the point of view of the story of life, this painting may depict a traumatic and frightening event.

From energy point of view it is just the process of change. In the end of it, maybe there will appear new forms that will be better adjusted for swift movement? And it is also possible that after this movement the forms will disappear all together and there will only be a peaceful sea of energy, in which some things appear and disappear.

The forms are the story.

The sea is the ground of all.

So what do they think about the wind?

From the story point of view it is what brings a disaster.

From energy point of view it is how freedom manifests.

210.Forget about the preparations

Forget about the preparations.

The wind took everything away

There was a ladder ready to climb

There was a golden gate to open

Then the inner wind came running

Like a wild mythological animal

And took everything away with it

Come, we’re going

Forget about the preparations.

99.The awakening of curiosity

Twice this night I came to this table, made drawings and went in with words. The nerves are now closer to the surface and burn all the time. Sometimes I can take it and sometimes I can’t. But even when I can’t, I take, because there is nothing that can be done. The salves that I have and used to help a little don’t affect the pain more than in an insignificant way. So I almost fall asleep, because I am so tired after many nights like this, and wake up with a peak of pain that I cannot take.

In most cases I find something that I can do in a meditative way, to calm the body down at least. Then I fall asleep. But this night it was hard, as it has been for a few weeks now. Maybe it is the tiredness that makes it hard. I try to think a thought that will make me feel better and imagine something that makes me feel good, but I am very tired and start to be upset. What is going on, I want to know? So many times I thought that the end has come already, and yet the pain just increases. When will it end?

Yesterday I had a hint that I have to be patient. We have a pot with daffodils that we got as a present in Christmas. Until yesterday there was no sign of growth. There are five of them in the pot and all had a short, one inch, thick, green shoot coming out of the bulb. This did not change for almost three months. Every morning I gave them a little bit of water. Yesterday morning I watered them again. They still looked the same. I gave up on them. I saw other daffodils growing already in other places. In the afternoon I saw them again and one of them had grown that green shoot by two inches between morning and afternoon. And I thought: I can take this as a hint that I have to be patient. It seems that the breakthrough has not happened for me yet, but it will, when something will be right, as it was for that daffodil.

In both drawings, when I went in with words, the text just came as it is, without any scrambling or manipulation. I added a couple of connecting words to the first text and erased two words in the second.

The hot wind blew

The hot wind blew

Nothing.

The hot wind blew everything away

All became dust

In the air

Yes, there was an emotion there

That the wind blew

With pieces of the green of the earth

A few specks of soil

The oceans

And the melancholy moans.

 I officially declare and acknowledge

That this is what

Transpired.

Something happens in the sky

Something happens in the sky

Something beautiful

And terrible

Happens in the sky

All the words that I have

Will do nothing with this

I have no words

I am wounded

I am denied normal life

And understanding

It is beyond me

Do things fall apart

Or come together?

I do not know.

I still don’t know what is going on, but something does happen and I feel a little better after doing the process, maybe because my curiosity has been triggered.

And here, in these last words hides one of the secrets of healing. We think that in order for a healing to be, the pain or any other manifestation has to change. But the real healing is never in that change. Rather, the change is a result of the awakening of the true self. The awakening of curiosity is the healing here.


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The healing process

Entries 1-58 show how I use the method of Intuition Through Art to heal myself from Peripheral Neuropathy.