Which direction do you grow?
To where the joy will take me.
What do you hold on to?
Nothing.
And who is looking at you?
I alone look at me.
There is nobody else
Anywhere.
Archive for the 'Infinite space' Category
249. Who?
Published December 8, 2016 evolving , healing , identification , Infinite space , Inner light , Intuition , letting go , making art , perception , Physical and non physical , Reading art , Spiritual , Truth 1 CommentTags: anywhere, direction, holding on, joy, nobody, nothing, who
246. I just stopped
Published November 20, 2016 evolving , healing , identification , Infinite space , Intuition , making art , Reading art , Spiritual , The world of thoughts , Truth 1 CommentTags: forever, going on, message, stopped
I just stopped at some point
There was no point in going on
The message was in how it could go on
Forever.
245.From dense to airy
Published November 18, 2016 evolving , healing , identification , Infinite space , Intuition , making art , perception , Reading art , Spiritual 1 CommentTags: Airy, composition, confusing, dense, fulfillment, layers, peace, read, space
I’m reading this picture, based on its composition. This will be a preliminary reading. I’ll point out a few obvious things and see what I can gather from this. It is possible to read much more in the picture, and maybe I’ll do this in the next entry.
It has two layers, as many of my paintings lately. The drawing layer has three areas. The right side has many architectural shapes. It is organized in mostly perpendicular and horizontal directions, with a few diagonals, that you can find in architecture too.
The left side has shapes that are more organic. The shapes are free from the straight angles of the right side and they grow into each other. The third area is where there is no drawing, or only little short lines that seem to float in space. That’s where there is less density and more freedom.
The pencil lines, those that define the colored areas, go on top of the watercolor lines. In this way they create some confusion, because the colors inside of the pencil lines are all underneath the ochre lines of the drawing. This contradictory message creates a strong connection of the background shapes and the drawing, indicating that the two layers are very close to each other and depend on each other to tell the story of the picture. And it is hard to decide what is more important or primary.
The color shapes in the right side go along with the feeling of architecture or a city. The color shapes on the left go along with the feeling of an organic shape, something that is alive and moving. It is like a person in a sitting position. His two hands are extended to the far left, and it seems that he is doing something outside of the picture.
And there is indeed space around the person and the part of the city that we see. Some smaller shapes float there, breaking the density of the city and the man and giving the picture some places with less tension to rest in.
So the focus of the man is in the more spacious area. That’s what he is interested in.
Basically we have a transition from an area that is densely full of visual events, through more relaxed shapes, that break the straight lines rule, to the beginning of space, into which the smaller pieces of the reality that’s on the right are falling or spreading.
In a shorter way, the picture shows the shift from eventful and intense reality to more peacefulness and freedom.
This is an experience of the now-life that we can read in the basic features of the composition.
If I ask myself where would I want to be, in this picture, the answer is “In all three places.”
I’d like to experience the peace that is outside of the objects, I’d like to experience the richness of the city, and I’d like to experience my body, alive and feeling.
And as I have all three of them at the same time, I can say that I am fulfilled. In this fulfillment there is peace too, till the next interest will catch me.
Isn’t this amazing that from so little you can say so much already?
I do not know what name to give this new chapter. Everything is different for me, and the same. I decide to let the chapter grow and deserve a name, and then it will have it.
243. (re)Discovering
Published October 10, 2016 evolving , healing , identification , Infinite space , Intuition , letting go , making art , meditation , perception , Physical and non physical , Reading art , Spiritual , Truth 1 CommentTags: change, curious, depth, Discovering, eternity, finding, life on earth, rediscovering, satisfaction, trip, what you love, who you are
Discovering who you are is the main issue of life on earth.
You can find yourself in many ways and in many places and things. Actually, in every thing.
The best way is through doing what you love to do and taking this way as a trip to the depth of who you are.
You will change along the way, and maybe what you love doing more than anything else will change too. You have to always choose to do what you most love at the moment.
You will start finding yourself in small steps or maybe big. And every time you find yourself, you will feel satisfied. Finding yourself is the source of satisfaction. I want to say the only source, but I’m not sure yet. All this knowledge comes to me as a surprise, and at the same time as something that I have known before.
After the satisfaction periods you will start being curious again, and you will again use doing what you most love at that time to move on towards the depths of yourself.
All of the trip happens between you and eternity, which is you too.
238. A story about idealism and reality
Published June 28, 2016 energy , evolving , healing , identification , Infinite space , Inner light , Intuition , making art , Physical and non physical , Reading art , Spiritual 5 CommentsTags: beautiful, beauty, beliefs, body, change, colors, curiosity, drawing, experience, intuition, joy, love, play, playfulness, real, release, story, subconscious, suffering, thoughts
I was born in Israel and my parents were idealistic pioneers. They built Israel from nothing, with all the others there of course. They wanted social justice, a place to live and grow their food, a place where they could have a country and a piece of land and they wanted their children to be born in a country with a house and a field. I drank idealism with my mother’s milk. (This was long ago. Now it is a bit more complicated there.)
I was an artist from young age. I went to study graphic design. In Graphic Design you make art that is used immediately. Then I was an illustrator. As an illustrator you illustrate children’s books, for children to grow up with good stories, with knowledge and love of the world about them, with a good taste in art, as it makes for a better life. And you illustrate for adults so that they will think in a different way and they will laugh…
Then I got involved with Buddhist meditation, and the idea was to know what I am, so that I’ll live my true life.
And indeed, once you start to know something you start teaching. What can be more important than helping others know what they are, so that their lives will be good, and truthful? And that they will be good people, help each other and create a wonderful world for all of us, and our offspring…
Then I went to study art therapy, so I would be able to help people get rid of what held them back from being what they were. To show them how to become free of inhibiting ideas and thrive, so that they can live happily and lovingly etc.
And I did all these. I was idealistic and practical.
Then I started to know that every one of us has his own world, created by his own consciousness. We do not live in the same world. Our worlds meet with each other and it looks as if it is one world, but it is not so.
You can’t create a meaningful change in any part of the reality that is around you in your world. If you want this reality to change, you have to change yourself. The new thoughts and beliefs that you will have will bring to you everything that fits this new state of mind. So I cannot change or help change the people who come to do therapy with me. In one view, they are part of my outside world. I have to change myself, and as a result another version of that person will appear in my world, which will be a match to the way I have become. From another view, the patient is in another world, where he is the only one who can make changes in his world, by changing himself.
I always thought that we all lived in the same world. That there was one person in front of me, who suffered, and I helped him release the suffering and live a better life. But no.
And I thought that making art was a good thing for other people, to widen and deepen their experience, to give them the experience of beauty that will help them live a more beautiful life, with love, with collaboration, with understanding…
Now I felt there was no sense in doing anything. I always had a purpose for doing things and I missed it.
It felt like depression.
Then I decided to ask August Moon about it.
August Moon is my inner guide. I have been connected with him for a while. He always answers. He is always there.
I asked and made a drawing, as I like to get the answers through the art. Sometimes I know through words, but if it is a big thing, I make art and read the answer in it. I just like it this way.
And as soon as I started making the art, I knew the answer. The lines in the drawing spoke to me with the energy that is in them:
The reason to do anything, to do all that you want to do, is not that there is a need for it. You are not doing it for any idealistic purpose. You do it because it is your nature to be interested in doing things. It is your nature to love. It is your nature to be curious, playful, peaceful, capable and creative. This nature is what you are and it is expressed by what you do. So you do, just because you are a natural expresser of yourself.
So, you see? There is no outside reason for me to be happy. I am happiness.
And how can this be depressed?
237. A city that is a flower
Published June 19, 2016 evolving , healing , identification , Infinite space , Intuition , letting go , making art , Physical and non physical , Reading art , Spiritual 19 CommentsTags: beautiful, beauty, breathless, Calvino, experience, fight, infinite, intuition, joy
Like Italo Calvino, who wrote about cities that never were, I too write. It is about our reality.
Sometimes a living thing appears and it is a miracle that it stands at all.
It stands for a very short time indeed, when there is no wind of course, without too many sets of eyes to look at it, and only a few hearts to flutter breathlessly.
Sound familiar? Maybe not?
Don’t fight, people. There is no real victory. Let your claims fall to empty space.
The city council (in the city that is a flower) is in a meeting. For now there are no results.
The grey cloud examines the degree of truth in what the piece of sky expressed.
The castle is simply pointing up while the ochre looks down with penetrating eyes. The green agrees to disagree.
But there is nobody to listen anyway. The city is too delicate for this. The city is a flower. The city is created by a mind that’s only joy.
Don’t fight, people.
Accept defeat on the level of the argument, because you cannot win.
Hug your doubts about what is possible
And dive into the deeper space
That is right here.
236.The energy is left with no job
Published June 10, 2016 energy , evolving , healing , Infinite space , Inner light , Intuition , letting go , making art , MAking it possible , meditation , Reading art , Spiritual , The world of thoughts 1 CommentTags: beauty, beliefs, body, change, colors, curiosity, drawing, energy, fear, heart, infinite, joy, light, love, meditation, pain, playfulness, release, stories, story, suffering, thoughts
All the colors stand around me, in bottles, tubes and pencils. They are looking quietly at what I do. What will I say? They are my audience now.
I love them. They can do infinite things. They do not really look. I know. It is the whole who looks. The infinite listening-with-the-heart. The heart-of-listening. His name is I.
When the light of seeing is bright and strong, everything that is non-transparent burns into non-existence. Its energy is left with no job. It gives itself back to be used for creation.
The name of the creator is I too.
It seems the light in the middle of the painting (the yellow and orange) is marred. It has been hit on the head.
Darkness (on the left) makes a threat. But the little child-who-flies is not afraid. He flies into the darkness to repair his past. He will find his love that he rejected in those old times. It is like the soul-retrieval that shamans do.
The goodness and the freedom-filled-joy, which is the lost part of him, will be found where it went to hide when it was not permitted to act in the world. It will be invited back and respected, loved, accepted, joined.
Again the lines tell the stories. The color shapes tell the emotions. The composition says that all is blessed, with all its tiniest details.
The white always looks with endless love and curiosity, with awe, with pride and marvel.
There is confusion there too, on the right, projecting a yes-no feeling.
Everything is okay.
The big yellow mother would like to say: Be careful!
But she knows that daring requires love and trust, and not carefulness. So she does not say a word. She admires her child.
#####
Yesterday in the morning I sat on the window seat and meditated. With all the lack of sleep that I collected, because of the pain, I fell asleep. I lost my balance and fell. I opened my eyes in the middle of the fall and saw the world turning around. But I was still asleep when my forehead hit the floor.
Then I woke up.
I felt fear and this conjured up memories from an event in my childhood, that now I saw more fully than before. Doors that were closed before, opened.
Fear cannot come if there is no story behind it. Falling cannot happen without a belief or a few beliefs that invite it. I know this is strange for some.
After some time I did this painting.
234. Segovia and the quiet spot
Published May 17, 2016 evolving , healing , identification , Infinite space , Inner light , Intuition , letting go , making art , meditation , perception , Physical and non physical , Reading art , Spiritual , Truth 2 CommentsTags: beauty, body, change, curiosity, drawing, experience, fear, free, infinite, intuition, joy, love, play, playfulness, stories, story, suffering, thoughts
Mooji showed up in front of me, when I was going through videos to enjoy but I moved on every time. Now I stopped and let him speak. He is like an old friend that I love deeply. So my heart opens. What will he say now?
In everything that he says and in the way he moves, I feel that-infinite-space attending, just like my own one right now. I realize that I came to like the taste of this state. It starts to be familiar.
And he says that when a troublesome event comes up and we have a shock, a fear, or we are being shockingly and fearfully agitated, the thing to do is to find the quiet spot that is always there too, and go into this, stay in this.
And this is what this reminds me of:
When both of Segovia’s parents died and he was left alone in his world, he was some six years old, or maybe less. He was very sad, and I am crying for this sadness now because I feel some of it. Somehow there was someone there who knew what to do. He or she put Segovia (little Andre) on the train with all his belongings and sent him to his grandfather in another city.
Grandpa took him from the station and brought him home. For Segovia this was a strange person who he did not know. Grandpa sat Segovia on a chair and sat himself on another chair facing Segovia and in his hands he had his guitar. Segovia did not play guitar yet.
Grandpa made a chord.
Segovia cried.
Grandpa made another cord.
Segovia cried more.
And so they went. Grandpa played chords and Segovia cried, until Segovia smiled.
This was his introduction to his grandpa. And this is what brought the guitar to his life. And it was also his introduction to that different love that comes with insight and cannot be broken.
You see? Whatever life brought, whatever emotional response he had, he went to this direct-no-story effect of the sounds and this became his quiet spot. Maybe at first he did not even perceive the sweetness of the chord. Eventually he fell in love with it.
Maybe you do not immediately feel the huge, deeply joyful, childishly curious, absolutely peaceful character of the inner peace. But with many visits it becomes inevitable that the taste will come through. And there will be a sweet love that has just awakened in your heart, that will take you there again and again and it will be your home, the only place where there is no contradiction whatsoever between you and the place. And with no contradiction, you are the place and the place is you. And so it goes for everything.
(As for the story about Segovia, I hope it is close enough to the truth. I heard it on public radio long ago. The details may have been somewhat different but the core is true.)
233. How the “I” moves to a wider view
Published May 14, 2016 energy , evolving , healing , identification , Infinite space , Intuition , letting go , making art , MAking it possible , meditation , perception , Physical and non physical , Reading art , Spiritual , The world of thoughts , Truth 3 CommentsTags: beauty, beliefs, body, change, colors, curiosity, dance, drawing, energy, experience, flow, free, heal, heart, infinite, joy, love, meditation, pain, play, playfulness, real, reality, release, sadness, space, stories, story, subconscious, suffering, thinking, thoughts, words
Being tired and in pain I became sad. Pain is a simple thing but living with it creates additional problems. Now all of them weighed on me. I thought: I can’t go on like this any more. I did not even paint yesterday and today.
My friend from Germany called. We started to talk and the phone line went dead.
I pulled a new piece of paper onto the table, dipped the brush into the water and into the first paint that my eyes saw in the watercolor box. It was olive green. This is how I choose the first color.
And then there was the drawing. No time. No pain. Brush, water, paint and the composition, the story with no words. The energy of the truth. Everything is good.
The olive green lines and the white of the paper are the best of friends. It is a holy connection. The lines, strikingly, appearing out of the white. The white does not have inside and outside. It is everywhere. It is all-there-is-everywhere. Even the word everywhere does not fit here. Is the green line real? And my eyes that see it: are they real? And my heart that has just become so full and so delighted, what about it?
(The other colors came later.)
Now in a different way:
Pain is part of the illusion of life, together with the body, with time, with good and bad.
The true self cannot have pain. Its essence is joy. Its essence is love and playing and being curious. The true self cannot be affected by the illusion.
For the “I” in the illusion pain is real and hard.
The good thing is that everything is connected. All I need to do is to change the way I focus and switch my identity to the true I.
Instead of focusing on the pain and automatically trying to escape it, to fight it, to prevent it, to change it, Instead of these, I find my curiosity and make the olive green lines. I find my playfulness and play with everything that shows itself. I look for the beauty in everything and find it easily. I look for my joy and it is right there. I am joyful. I look for my love and indeed what else do I have? This is how I start to identify with the true self.
And as I do this, I find that I have forgotten the pain. I don’t even feel it. Or if I do, it is not significant. I am in peace. The vibrations of the pain, the waves that streamed through the legs calm down. My hands that clutched one foot fall down, relaxed. The body rests. The energy of creation flows flawlessly everywhere it has to go. The body heals. The specific thinking processes that hold on to the body and its suffering become weaker. I am not so dependent on the body and the world around it. I witness them and I am free. In my mind I am already walking down to town, where the galleries are. I am going to see an exhibition. Right foot, left foot and I dance.
231. Yes it is
Published April 24, 2016 dream , identification , Infinite space , Intuition , making art , perception , Reading art , Spiritual 5 CommentsTags: a human being, change, curiosity, dream, experience, intuition, sleep
I look at my last drawing. The shape in the middle feels like a heavy package with several parts, almost floating heavily in a space that seems to be organized like a room on stilts. There is night in the window and a warm light is reflected from the floor. There is something that looks like a toy on the floor.
Let’s look at the package.
I know there is a man sitting, his back supported by a few things.
There is something with a door on the lower right side.
I’ll leave it up to you.
Maybe the man who sits is asleep?
It is night as we can see through the window. There is a sense of being wrapped in a blanket. The room feels like a dream flying above the space that is underneath.
Not real, heavily asleep while sitting, a lot of air comes in through the walls. A river of light breaks through what should have been solid. Isn’t it like a dream?
And when he dreams
The room collapses.
The sky and the earth
Open up
Space that goes to no end
Starts here.
You have to dream
To enter the space
Don’t make an effort
The essence
Of the space
Will carry you
If you have no opinion
You’ll become like the essence
Of the space
Is it good?
Yes it is.
You are already there.
Do you have any more questions?
No.
All the answers come to me.
I know all.
I am all.
intuitiveflow 